Wednesday, December 02, 2009

MN-01 : Minnesota’s Newest Funny Man

Although this is the time of the year that candidates are announcing their intentions to run in 2010, let’s look at one candidate’s assessment of the 2008 elections.
For example here’s his assessment of how Wyoming would vote : “As always, the only residents not voting Republican are the ones Dick “Big Time” Cheney shot in the head or ran off the road on his record number of D.W.I. convictions.”
Or, Idaho : “Everyone from Idaho’s Governor down to the state’s white supremacist greeter will vote for McCain-Palin.
Or, Iowa : “Iowans are considering a ballot initiative that would change the state’s constitution to preclude “idiots” from voting. This confirms suspicions that Iowa actually stands for “Idiots Out Walking Around.” The idiot initiative was supposed to be on the ballot in 2006, but a screw up by the Secretary of State delayed consideration until this election. Idiot. Had this new voting standard been in effect for today’s election, the final vote would have been: McCain 973,340 - Obama 0. Instead, Obama-Biden win by 10.
And in accessing the US Senate contest in North Carolina, he writes “last minute advertisement by husband and former Senator Robert Dole, who pulled out all the stops to try and save his beleaguered wife’s campaign. The advertisement, a take off on Senator Dole’s old Pfizer commercials, went like this:
Hi. I’m Bob Dole. I take Viagra because I have ED - Elizabeth Dole.
Dole Loses badly

And in a tribute to Minnesota’s former Senator, the writer gives an award in his name : “Each election the Rod Award is extended to the Republican Member of Congress who performs the most idiotic, immoral behavior that virtually guarantees defeat. The award is named after former Senator Rod Grams (Playboy-Minnesota), who was soundly defeated for reelection in 2000. This year the Rod Award goes to two numskulls who couldn’t keep “it” in their pants long enough to get reelected. The two award winners are: Idaho Senator Larry ”Wide Stance” Craig and New York Congressman Vito “Vino” Fossella.

WOW … I’m rolling with laughter. Reading candidate’s Election Masterpiece can only mean that the debates won’t be boring.

So who is this candidate bashing these Republicans ?

Long time Minnesota voters may remember the Hagedorn name … that has been missing from local politics since Tom Hagedorn was defeated by Tim Penny in 1982 to represent the southern Minnesota in Congress. Hagedorn is now president of a number of real estate operations in Virginia (Premium Properties, LLC, Premium Financial Services, Inc., etc.) and is listed on the Board of Directors of Electromed, Inc. - a New Prague medical company.

But this not Tom trying to return to Minnesota politics, but his son Jim. Oh, yeah, Jim has announced his intent to seek the Republican nomination to represent Minnesota’s First District.

Don’t know Jim … that may be the first joke on First District voters. According to his bio, he entered George Mason University in 1980. Then did a little work as a legislative assistant and spent most of his career as part of Congressional Affairs Office at Bureau of Engraving and Printing. Currently, Hagedorn is employed as Director of Government Relations and Corporate Development for Electromed, Inc. (see company link above).

The picture seems clear … a son of a Congressman wants to follow his father footsteps and use his father’s contacts to make that happen.

So who does Hagedorn want to represent in Congress … his neighbors in southern Minnesota whom he just met in the past few months … or the financial and medical companies’ lobbyists that will surely provide the campaign contributions ?

So can Hagedorn win in 2010 ?
Well, here’s his assessment of the 2008 contest : “MN District 1 -Freshman Democrat Representative Tim Walz squares off against novice Republican candidate Dr. Brian Davis. Dr. Davis was roughed up in a bruising Republican primary and sadly the Congressman will wal(t)z to victory. Sorry about that one. However, the Congressman’s true beliefs are out-of-step with this right-leaning district and a competent Republican candidate could retake the seat in 2010 or 2012.
Well, I hope the 2010 MN-GOP primary isn’t that bruising, but at least he’s already got his eyes set on 2012.